27th of August...

Docklands, Melbourne
Australia
64.4° F (18° C)

27th of August...

It's been two years to the day since I started this blog.

Two years ago, I was sitting in my rented space inside a larger office... my two cubicle space where I attempted at starting my own software development group. Living in Korea was a curious experience... where the belief that I was Korean was utterly shattered. I struggled to understand why people would turn down a paying job to work as an unappreciated brainless manual labor pro bono. Out of frustration... and heartache, I began pouring out my soul and created this blog... The blog became my therapy... a tool for self-reflection... and a good friend... It has changed my life in more ways than I can describe...

I am forever grateful...

Happy two year anniversary.

 

song of the month:
Another Rainy Day
by Corinne Bailey Rae

I got taken in
We feasted on olives from the fridge
We stood the whole lonely day
We made love all afternoon
Til the stars went blue

You wrote a ballad
We dined on oysters and champagne
That's what it seemed like
We connect in so many ways
So easy, I must say

Why am I so shy around you?
Why am I so shy?
Why do I take care to astound you?
Why do I even try?

Another rainy day
We sat inside by the radiator watching old black and white films
Where everybody sang
You played in my solitude
Didn't get dressed 'til two

The rain says all
I wrote this song on my guitar
But it didn't turn out right
So we just connected in other ways
So easy, I must say

Why am I so shy around you?
Why am I so shy?
Why do I take care to astound you?
Why do I even try?

Why am I so shy around...
Oh why am I so shy?
Why do I take care...
Why do I even try?

Destiny, part 1 - The Legend

Some five thousand years ago, there existed a seven state nation without a king. The elders of the states prayed to the heavens for they were in need of a true leader. After many days have passed, a box descended from the heaven. When the elder opened the box, it contained seven large golden eggs. These eggs soon hatched into seven healthy baby boys. The babies grew into adults within several days and became the seven heads of states to lead the nation. That is how our family name Kim (김 in Hangul, 金 in Chinese), which means gold, came to be.

Well... at least that's what I remember from what my grandfather had read out of first volume of our family's genealogical archives.

NOTE:
The family archive makes no pretense as to it being the absolute truth. It does explicitely state that the story is a legend of our beginning that has been passed down by word of mouth until it was finally written down.

disillusionment

Docklands, Melbourne
Australia
59° F (15° C)

Perhaps it's the perpetual sleep deprivation or the dreary winter days, but I can't shake this sense of disillusionment.

Many years ago, I had wondered if I would ever see the "land down under"... where kangaroos roam and koalas nibble on eucalyptus. I was under the impression Australia was a country full of friendly and laid-back individuals that love the outdoors. Well... after being given the finger, enduring a good three months of howling drunks, and experiencing some ill treatment (racially biased), I can safely say the illusions of cheerful and carefree land is nowhere to be found.

I seem to have mentally compiled a long list of reasons why I am quite literally counting down to the day of my departure.

I have to say, it may be a great country for many... but it's just not the place for me.... so I must soldier on... to another country.

25 days and counting...

chanson du jour:
Over It
by Katharine McPhee

just as I am...

Docklands, Melbourne
Australia
51.8° F (11t° C)

A much younger coworker was talking about the intricate dance we like to call "dating". He thought the date had gone well, but after two unreturned phone calls he seemed perplexed and disappointed. He was wondering if he had called a bit too early after the first date. "Just be yourself and call whenever you feel is right", I said. "Do what feel natural to you and you'll find the one who is right for you..."

Some time ago, I had decided I was no longer going to play the game anymore. I was going to just be myself: no false pretenses. I realized if I pretend to be someone who I am not, I will end up with someone who won't appreciate me for who I am. No matter how quirky, melancholy, silly, and eccentric I may be, I believe, with all my heart, there is someone out there who will love me just the way I am.

chanson de la semaine:
Littlest Things
Alright, Still
by Lily Allen